Official PHOTOS Thread

JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
difficult.jpg

I watch these police shows, and the narrator talks about the LEO’s hunch when they see a suspect’s car. I have NO police training, but even I can spot them when they have a yellow targeting box around them and it states “SUSPECT VEHICLE”. Come on, how difficult is this?
 

JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
And the siren goes: Meeeeeoooowwww!

siren meoooow.jpg
 

JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
Ma'am, in order to perform a head-to-toe assessment on you, including any trauma to your back, I'm going to need to un-lace you.

corsetting.jpg
 

WhelenNDealin

Member
Aug 6, 2017
575
Ontario, Canada
View attachment 211921

I watch these police shows, and the narrator talks about the LEO’s hunch when they see a suspect’s car. I have NO police training, but even I can spot them when they have a yellow targeting box around them and it states “SUSPECT VEHICLE”. Come on, how difficult is this?

Clearly the narrator is Robocop or the video is from Robocop's perspective. Targeting box should be green, but maybe he's been upgraded since 1987.


Oh yet another "Only in Russia" moment! Even if they weren't waving the Russian flag and nothing that even alluded to Russia was present (I'm looking at you, Lenin statue!), you'd just know that this was taken in Russia. What amazes me is the officers' ability to balance like that after drinking a quart of vodka. As for the cars, they're like that due to the drivers also drinking a quart of vodka. That, or it's how they actually drive them in Russia because, c'mon, it's Russia.
 

jph2

Member
Apr 21, 2012
2,122
USA Michigan
Oh yet another "Only in Russia" moment! Even if they weren't waving the Russian flag and nothing that even alluded to Russia was present (I'm looking at you, Lenin statue!), you'd just know that this was taken in Russia. What amazes me is the officers' ability to balance like that after drinking a quart of vodka. As for the cars, they're like that due to the drivers also drinking a quart of vodka. That, or it's how they actually drive them in Russia because, c'mon, it's Russia.

Actually, it's because in Soviet Russia, car drives YOU!
 

WhelenNDealin

Member
Aug 6, 2017
575
Ontario, Canada
Actually, it's because in Soviet Russia, car drives YOU!

Or maybe in Soviet Russia, vodka drinks you? No wait. It's Russia, the Russians are the ones doing the drinking there. Not even Yakov Smirnoff can turn that one around.

Maybe in Soviet Russia, you get vodka drunk. Given the BAC of the average Ruskie, they would indeed be able to somehow give alcohol a buzz. A drunk Russian will get even the strongest moonshine seeing triple.
 
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JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
Found another photo of Jarred as a child.

Jerad.jpg
 

Jarred J.

Lifetime VIP Donor
May 21, 2010
11,580
Shelbyville, TN
nope didnt have blonde hair except for the first few days and my sister didnt have "kid sisters"
 

WhelenNDealin

Member
Aug 6, 2017
575
Ontario, Canada
Found another photo of Jarred as a child.

View attachment 219738

That's seriously creepy, Jazz. It's almost Japan-level creepy. Ok not quite that far. No tentacles and he's not taking a hidden upskirt photo. Don't lower Jarred to that level of creepiness! Besides, I just can't imagine him wearing purple socks, let alone flood pants. I can imagine him carrying an Auto-9 in his leg and driving a matte grey 87 Taurus, though. Jazz, don't you dare Photoshop something up with RoboJarred doing something creepy. It's "your move, creep" ; "not my creepy move"! He has connections, Jazz. To a senior Vice President and he might send a fella to pay you a visit the next time you're partying with some JazzDad Groupies. Chances of there being such groupies are slim to nil, but I dunno, crazier things have happened.

But great to see you back, Jazz! Don't know where you went, but were likely run out of town a few times. There was a void with you gone. I'd log in expecting wacky photos, but sadly nothing.

Then you log in with a creepy photo. Maybe you've lost your edge in retirement. I'm a bit disappointed. Is it a bit of senility setting in? Oh wait, that set in 35 years ago by the looks of it ;). Just don't become one of those unbearable retirees like in those awful Consumer Cellular and AARP commercials! If you start hawking Consumer Cellular totally out of context, we're all going to shun you!

Still, it's great to see you back!
 

JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
OK. Nor more pix of Jarred.

This is not a photo of Jarred.

Jarred2.jpg
 
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JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
Not me - no goggles.
 

brts96

Member
Feb 11, 2011
108
U.S, MN
Heard Jazz got new goggles, and looks more like this.

Just kidding (a little, anyway).
 

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WhelenNDealin

Member
Aug 6, 2017
575
Ontario, Canada

Look like these Dutch cops had a trip to a cannabis coffee shop. After eating one too many special donuts, they thought that it'd be hilarious to lay all of their equipment out. Strange how they didn't lay out their riot wooden clogs.

Then they got sleepy and had a nap. Looks like their duty belts got in the way of comfortable napping.

At least they had the courtesy to throw out their empty Taco Windmill wrappers and Tulip-Shaped Cheeto bags before they KOed. The Dutch are good like that.
 

Jarred J.

Lifetime VIP Donor
May 21, 2010
11,580
Shelbyville, TN
they are so polite they put it on their cars...
 
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Turd Ferguson

Member
Jul 3, 2011
2,250
Sumner, Wa
I always wanted a Dutch Police play set.
 
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WhelenNDealin

Member
Aug 6, 2017
575
Ontario, Canada
they are so polite they put it on their cars...

No, no. You're thinking of Canadian cops. Vehicle markings here will say "Sorry" and "Excuse me" in at least a few places.
 

WhelenNDealin

Member
Aug 6, 2017
575
Ontario, Canada
This is factually accurate. Quebecers whine about everything. If they don't get their way, they say they're going to separate. Years ago, the country was saying "No! Please stay!" Nowadays, it's "We'll help you pack your bags!" We'll just tariff the heck out of their main exports: strippers, hookers and STIs.
 

Jarred J.

Lifetime VIP Donor
May 21, 2010
11,580
Shelbyville, TN
Idk what your infatuation is with me, but no. I wasn't ever that stupid as a kid nor did we have stores that big and I've never worn pink in my life...
 

Turd Ferguson

Member
Jul 3, 2011
2,250
Sumner, Wa

WhelenNDealin

Member
Aug 6, 2017
575
Ontario, Canada
In French and English, right?

Technically yes, but the rest of the country could care less about apologizing to or being polite to Quebec anymore. If we had our way, vehicles would have markings telling Quebecers off in no uncertain terms, but bleeding hearts and snowflakes would cry and scream for their blankies to no end.
 

JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
Sitting in the desert.

Ambo.JPG
 

JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
I suspect a long break - the tires were nearly flat.
 

Turd Ferguson

Member
Jul 3, 2011
2,250
Sumner, Wa
Anytime I see JazzDad as the most recent in the photos thread, I always have to prepare myself mentally before clicking. Glad to see the last couple submissions have not required eye bleach.
 
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