Behind the scenes

Turd Ferguson

Member
Jul 3, 2011
2,250
Sumner, Wa
Just out of curiosity, what does JDI offer for the SAR/react/skyporn amber light whackers? Was thinking after a long hiatus from lightning about upfitting my grand prix and starting a local react club. Going to need lots of amber, though.
 

JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
JDI, Inc. will now be offering K-9 retrofit kits for most major vehicles. In fact, we are re-defining how the industry thinks about K-9 operations.


Now, instead of just riding around in the back, your 4-footed officer can operate his own unit. You’ll be the envy of every agency in your area when your K-9 unit pulls up with Fido behind the wheel. We have everything from pedal extensions to door handles for those department members who were formerly limited by their lack of opposable thumbs. Tired of the high cost of dog food and vet bills? No longer will your dog be a burden to the department. Besides just performing searches, with JDI’s help he can:

  • operate radar enforcement
  • patrol the neighborhood
  • issue citations
  • make donuts runs.




Canine.JPG


Don’t hesitate. Contact “Spike” in our sales department today for more information.


Spike.JPG
 

Turd Ferguson

Member
Jul 3, 2011
2,250
Sumner, Wa
I would like to submit a JDI product idea. The GROW 2000. GROW, an acronym for Guaranteed Right Of Way, replaces the center section of a lightbar with a small guided tactical nuclear device that when fired, will instantly vaporize any other vehicle which does not yield to your lights and sirens. Vaporization means no messy clean up ( though a slight dusting by a street sweeper may be all that is required ) and no heaping wrecks to have to swerve around. Plus, with your dash cam footage, you can always entertain everyone watching the fallout again and again. Order yours today.
 
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Apr 28, 2013
337
New York/Mass
SeattleSAR said:
I would like to submit a JDI product idea. The GROW 2000. GROW, an acronym for Guaranteed Right Of Way, replaces the center section of a lightbar with a small guided tactical nuclear device that when fired, will instantly vaporize any other vehicle which does not yield to your lights and sirens. Vaporization means no messy clean up ( though a slight dusting by a street sweeper may be all that is required ) and no heaping wrecks to have to swerve around. Plus, with your dash cam footage, you can always entertain everyone watching the fallout again and again. Order yours today.

Can someone good with photoshop/video editing PLEASE make a video of this..
 

Turd Ferguson

Member
Jul 3, 2011
2,250
Sumner, Wa
proudfirefighter said:
Can someone good with photoshop/video editing PLEASE make a video of this..

Don't know why, but reading that made me laugh. Definite +1 on that. Good call.
 

Turd Ferguson

Member
Jul 3, 2011
2,250
Sumner, Wa
So I heard back from JDI Legal, and development of the GROW 2000 will commence in conjunction with the newly formed SeattleSAR Technologies Corp. More news as it develops.
 

Turd Ferguson

Member
Jul 3, 2011
2,250
Sumner, Wa
JazzDad said:

Are you planning a hostile takeover of SeattleSAR Tech? No need for hostilities, we can negotiate fairly. Matter of fact, I'll give you the rights to STC in exchange for 24 beers, a steak dinner with all the trimmings and a position as head of new product development at JDI. Oh yeah, and a 1 year supply of bacon.


In exchange, you will receive the plans for all of our products.
 

JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
Speaking of R&D, here are two of our team doing something. (I don't understand most of what they do.)


RandD.jpg
 

JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
SeattleSAR said:
... Oh yeah, and a 1 year supply of bacon. ...

Deal breaker. JDI is only a multi-billion dollar corporation, and your propensity for bacon consumption is legendary.
 
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Turd Ferguson

Member
Jul 3, 2011
2,250
Sumner, Wa
JazzDad said:
Deal breaker. JDI is only a multi-billion dollar corporation, and your propensity for bacon consumption is legendary.

I'll offer a partnership for the above, but instead of a 1 year supply, 2 pounds per week for 6 months.
 

Turd Ferguson

Member
Jul 3, 2011
2,250
Sumner, Wa
Well, at least you were polite about it.
 

JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
Here we have a lovely model showing off the JDI model 404T siren and lights controller.


controller.jpg


Next year, the 404U model will offer the option of the siren speakers mounted outside the passenger compartment.
 

JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
This may (or may not) be an offering from the JDI covert operations division, with office located somewhere. Or not.


covert operations div.jpg
 

cook2890

Member
Sep 27, 2010
456
Murfreesboro TN
JazzDad said:
This may (or may not) be an offering from the JDI covert operations division, with office located somewhere. Or not.

View attachment 68970

I thought this was JDI's latest 'smart phone' offering?
 

JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
Special Announcement from JazzDad Industries, Inc, JDI, LTD and IJD, AG.


JDI has been ISO 9001 compliant for years. We have always been the go-to company for innovation. And we are now pleased to say we are now 100% ADA compliant, with regard to the visually impaired.


For years, color blind people were confused when an emergency vehicle approached with their flashing lights on. At JDI, we’ve solved the problem. All future JDI products; lightbars, beacons and modules, along with the standard colors, will now be available also in BROWN. Fleet managers, think of the cost-savings in stocking only one color for replacement modules and filters!


Another option to help color blind folks recognize an approaching emergency vehicle are our new LED modules that spell out the color (see photo).


new bar.jpg


There can be no color-ambiguity with these products.


We haven’t neglected totally blind folks. The last product, of which we are the most proud, is the COM-Hear®. The JDI Call Out Module interfaces with all brands of siren, even those companies whose equipment is not as well-made as JDI’s superior products. These units install in-line with the PA mic input, so there is no soldering needed. The siren tone is momentarily interrupted by a voice clearly stating the color of the light that is flashing. This product is limited only by the power of your siren, 100W, 200W or more! Example: Comet pattern will say, in a clear voice, ”red-red, blue-blue...” Action pattern calls out: ”red-blue-blue-red-blue-red-red-red-blue-red-red-blue-red...” For our customers across the big pond, we have Euro-specific COM-Hear® units that project “bleu, blau, blå”, etc; whatever your region requires. Our South Texas model will say, ”rojo” and ”azul”. (Be sure to specify language when ordering.)
 
Jul 14, 2010
1,639
S.W. Ohio USA
Epic! Sign me up for the voice module. Kinda reminds me of my old sergeant. When someone wouldn't move for him on a code 3 run, he would get on the PA and yell, "hey dumb ass,


PULL OVER!) Maybe you could offer a taped version of that..........
 

Jarred J.

Lifetime VIP Donor
May 21, 2010
11,584
Shelbyville, TN
don't forget the valley girl compliant version.


"its like red and uhhhhh ohh wait blue aww its like red and the blue."


not to be confused with hilly billy compliancy.


"hey jimbo what colur dat be over yonder is it read or blew?"


and hood compliant version....


"run its the 50"


with alternative of crip blood crip blood crip crip crip blood blood blood
 

JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
crescentstar69 said:
Epic! Sign me up for the voice module. Kinda reminds me of my old sergeant. When someone wouldn't move for him on a code 3 run, he would get on the PA and yell, "hey dumb ass,
PULL OVER!) Maybe you could offer a taped version of that..........

Not a bad idea. :undecided: Is Sarge still around?
 
Jul 14, 2010
1,639
S.W. Ohio USA
JazzDad said:
Not a bad idea. :undecided: Is Sarge still around?

Um, no......... He was "encouraged" to retire after 45 years of service after deciding he didn't want to chase a suspect on foot, so he hit him with the cruiser. On purpose. He handled it well. Tucked a jaywalking ticket into the guy's shirt pocket as they were loading him into the medic.
 

Turd Ferguson

Member
Jul 3, 2011
2,250
Sumner, Wa
crescentstar69 said:
Um, no......... He was "encouraged" to retire after 45 years of service after deciding he didn't want to chase a suspect on foot, so he hit him with the cruiser. On purpose. He handled it well. Tucked a jaywalking ticket into the guy's shirt pocket as they were loading him into the medic.

Now that's funny.
 

JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
There are many up-fitting companies out there, with varying degrees of competency. In the near future, JDI will be offering un-fitting services. We will remove the emergency equipment from your vehicles at the lowest cost around. E-mail us today for a bid.
 

kitn1mcc

Member
May 24, 2010
2,569
Old lyme ct
JazzDad said:
There are many up-fitting companies out there, with varying degrees of competency. In the near future, JDI will be offering un-fitting services. We will remove the emergency equipment from your vehicles at the lowest cost around. E-mail us today for a bid.


why do i get the feeling it involves a cutting torch and a hammer
 

Turd Ferguson

Member
Jul 3, 2011
2,250
Sumner, Wa
SeattleSAR Tech is currently working on a solution to down fitting emergency vehicles. Submitted by one of our people working on the GROW2000 Project, or system involves a .025 kiloton charge of weapons grade plutonium being placed on the center of the vehicle, then detonated. This process ensures the vehicle will NEVER be used for impersonation purposes.
 

JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
kitn1mcc said:
why do i get the feeling it involves a cutting torch and a hammer

Nah. That would damage all the cool stuff we are getting.
 

JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
SeattleSAR said:
SeattleSAR Tech is currently working on a solution to down fitting emergency vehicles. Submitted by one of our people working on the GROW2000 Project, or system involves a .025 kiloton charge of weapons grade plutonium being placed on the center of the vehicle, then detonated. This process ensures the vehicle will NEVER be used for impersonation purposes.

Salvage, me lad. That's the name of the game. :thumbsup:
 

JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
Speaking of sneak peaks, you, the eLightbars community, are the first to be notified of the big sale coming up at JDI. It's one day only, and we hold this sales extravaganza 3 out of every 4 years. So hurry in to the JDI retail store, or visit us on-line this February 29th.


JDI sale.jpg


Calm down, big boy!
 

cook2890

Member
Sep 27, 2010
456
Murfreesboro TN
txff914 said:
aimg.tapatalk.com_d_14_02_27_yvehese7.jpg I just found a sneak peak of jazz dads newest product.

Now if we could just figure out what it does... Hey Jazz, if we guess what is can we get one for free? (Plus shipping, handling, stocking fees, and tax, tag, and license of course).
 

Turd Ferguson

Member
Jul 3, 2011
2,250
Sumner, Wa
cook2890 said:
Now if we could just figure out what it does... Hey Jazz, if we guess what is can we get one for free? (Plus shipping, handling, stocking fees, and tax, tag, and license of course).

Don't forget the convenience fee.
 

JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
We have been told we have to put a warning label on all the new lightbars we ship.


The JDI Insaniti® lightbar. So bright, the FDA will not allow us to show it to you for fear of causing blindness.


Insaniti.jpg
 

Jarred J.

Lifetime VIP Donor
May 21, 2010
11,584
Shelbyville, TN
Seeing as how JDI is branching out into other avenues....


I present to you the individually sealed, lubricated, magic hair restoration kits.


here is a pic of another happy JDI customer...


70745d1394554202t-users-fail-starts-breast-avalanch-boobs-start-pg-10-now-longest-thread-too-medusa.jpg
 

JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
At a recent press conference to debut one of our new products, my former secretary upstaged me.


secretary.jpg


This was the audience's reaction to that product.


new JDI product.jpg
 

Turd Ferguson

Member
Jul 3, 2011
2,250
Sumner, Wa
R & D continues on the GROW2000. We've hit a small setback here at SeattleSAR Tech.


aimg.tapatalk.com_d_14_03_25_5aruny6y.jpg


We plan on reducing the payload on the next prototype.
 

JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
JazzDad said:


We recently asked 100 people which they thought was brighter; the sun or the new JDI Insaniti lightbar.


First, we had them look at the Insaniti.


We hope to have the class action lawsuit, filed on behalf of the 100 blind plaintiffs, in court this August.
 

Bobcat753

Member
Mar 9, 2014
327
Mass
I finally stumbled upon one of JDIs demo trucks! It seems like it is still not up fitted yet.

image.jpg
 

JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
OK, which of you wize-acres put this sign up in front of the JDI parking lot this morning?


Who is responsible.jpg
 

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