Behind the scenes

JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
I just wanted everyone to know that I will not be on the forum much, if at all, in the next two weeks.  Throughout the JDI conglomerate, mid-October is a time of great celebration.  All of the manufacturing facilities world-wide close to re-tool for the upcoming year’s production lines.  I have a tradition of visiting every plant, as the workers enjoy it so much.  They gather and throw flowers in my path.  The call me Great Leader.  Here is a photo of last year’s spontaneous outpouring of devotion during my visit to Yaounde, in Cameroon. 

workers.jpg

JDI is the largest employer in the region.  Note the JD Kinyesi lightbar in the lower left corner.
 

JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
No one is going to comment on the product name mentioned?
 
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Turd Ferguson

Member
Jul 3, 2011
2,250
Sumner, Wa
Sorry, but I only buy the JDI products made in the Kerplukistani facility because their workforce is certified 1.00% ebola free.*


* Certification issued by the US CDC.
 

JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
I'm back from touring the production facilities.  After all the employee adulation, it's good to be back on eLB.  Y'all remind me that I'm just like everyone else. 

(I assume your valet puts your pants on you one leg at a time.)
 
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Phoenix_Rising

Lifetime VIP Donor
Feb 27, 2012
6,742
Berks County PA
Sorry, but I only buy the JDI products made in the Kerplukistani facility because their workforce is certified 1.00% ebola free.*


* Certification issued by the US CDC.
I find that odd and questionable, as Im quite sure they can't count that high... :weird:
 

JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
Man, the forum has been slow lately.  We weren't going to make this announcement until next week, but I feel elb needed a little jump start.  (And I know there will be thousands of posts discussing this.)

An eLightbars exclusive sneak peek: the SilverFlare® by JDI.

Pictured, below, is the prototype of the newest fine product to join the superior line of JDI visual emergency warning devices; the SilverFlare®.  Colours are now passé.  No more of this red, amber and blue nonsense.  The SilverFlare® emits sterling beams of light brighter than any of the competition.  The bar is fully galvanised, to offer you years of care-free service.  This is the 60” bar, but it is available in even increments from 36 to 84 inches.  (Currently under scrutinization by SAE and those European guys.)  Coming out in January, 2015.  Place your pre-order now because these puppies are simply going to fly off the shelves. 

JDI’s – Ahead of the Times.

SilverFlash.JPG

(Chair not included.)
 
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Turd Ferguson

Member
Jul 3, 2011
2,250
Sumner, Wa
But is the chair available as an option for a modest price?
 
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JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
Market tip: Buy JDI stock today!  Its value is about to go through the roof. 

  • Incadescent - One Adam Twelve.
  • Halogen - Get real!
  • Strobes - Who are we kidding?
  • LEDs - Yesterday.

I can only say 2 more words:

Fluorescent Lights!
 

JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
The REAL face of JazzDad?

smiley.jpg

This isn't it, by the way.
 
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JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
Again, the JDI Engineering Team has surpassed its own goals. 

As everyone knows, dark time is just as important as the time a light is on.  When viewing a light, retinal persistence is the phenomena whereby the eye continues to see an image for a period of time after the lamp has stopped emitting.  (Think about looking at the flash of a camera.)  Our new LED modules have a longer ‘dwell’ time AND longer dark time. 

How can this possibly be, you may ask. 

All of the new JDI Intelliflasch™ lightsources have compressed time using electronic pulse coding.  By releasing the second burst of light before the second one has started, while simultaneously removing the bias current from the third pulse, the dilation-expansion curve becomes more exponential.  I could go on, but you just need to experience them yourselves.

LED.jpg

JDI LED component

Intelliflasch™ by JDI.  Once again ahead of the times, and ahead of time itself.
 
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Turd Ferguson

Member
Jul 3, 2011
2,250
Sumner, Wa
For an extra 1,300 pesos, you can get it previous day air.
 

Turd Ferguson

Member
Jul 3, 2011
2,250
Sumner, Wa
you are telling me jazz dad has a worm hole
I'm not allowed to say a lot, but I can confirm that SeattleSAR Technologies has been working in conjunction with JDI on innovations to revolutionize shipping methodologies.


This concludes my statement and unfortunately,I will not be able to take any questions at this time.
 

Jarred J.

Lifetime VIP Donor
May 21, 2010
11,580
Shelbyville, TN
well since you cant take a question... I shall leave one.

Why?
 
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JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
Questions, questions, questions!

December 1st ended JDI's fiscal year.

As President, CEO, CFO and Chairman of the Board of JazzDad Industries, Ltd, I want to offer a hearty “Thank you” to all of you who helped to make this past year the best ever for JDI.  Without the support of eLightbars, we would never have reached this milestone in our company’s history.  In 2014, our sales increased 100% over the previous calendar year.  We sold two lightbars this year!* 

I want to wish each and every one of you (including the rogue moderators) a prosperous 2015 and remember to “Buy JDI, because we really try, and they don’t always fry.”

*(Figures are not adjusted for returns due to purchaser’s dissatisfaction.)
 

Turd Ferguson

Member
Jul 3, 2011
2,250
Sumner, Wa
Agin when talking JDI dont Ask
Don't tell.

On a serious note, I'd like to be the first to congratulate JazzDad on his record sales year.
 
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Turd Ferguson

Member
Jul 3, 2011
2,250
Sumner, Wa
Aye.
 

brts96

Member
Feb 11, 2011
108
U.S, MN
Adult beverages are in the red cooler, soft drinks after in the blue cooler. There's a coffee pot going , if anyone wants some.


Let's get the grill started. I'm thinking we should have steaks, burgers, brats and hot dogs. Can anyone grab some chips?


If you're thinking this is a nice party, you're right. It should be, it's on the JDI tab. [emoji3]


Jazz, it might get expensive, we went to the store for the meat; rather than collecting it from any of JDI's vast woodlands. Besides, we heard most of the animals were being served up in the JDI cafeteria.


This is just ELB's way of thanking Jazz for such quality. Never let it be said truthfully that we didn't do the least we could.
 

JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
I came up with an idea, which I took to the JDI engineers to develop into a new product we could sell.  The R&D liaison to marketing made a quick call and told me, “No!”  Before I could tell him he was fired, he explained that even if we could take out a patent on it; 1. It would be too easy for an individual (or every company in China) to copy it and make their own, and 2. There would not be much demand for them.

You can see it’s made of 1 ½ inch PVC pipe.

1 whatsit.JPG

Because a firefighter might drop his or hers, there is a wrap of reflective tape on it.

2 reflective tape.JPG

One end cap is glued on, the other isn’t.  To keep from losing the removable cap, it is tethered.

3 one cap comes off.JPG

Did you figure it out?  Yes, it’s an eyeglasses holder. 

4 it holds glasses.JPG

Drop it in the pocket of your bunker pants or your wildland pack.  It is tough enough that you won’t damage your glasses when you are doing a primary search or up in the hosebed.  If you need glasses occasionally, here’s a way to protect them.  After all, you never know when you might be tapped to be an ICT or have to write an essay.

Brought to you as a public service from JDI.  JDI for a Better World.
 
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JazzDad

Member
Aug 5, 2011
5,165
USA
All I can say now is that JDI will be releasing their new SynLiMod (Synthetic Lighting Modules) soon.  Don't ask me to explain; I can't.  Let's just say it's magic.
 
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Turd Ferguson

Member
Jul 3, 2011
2,250
Sumner, Wa
Hey Jazz, are you able to comment in the rumor that I've heard about JDI possibly making a beer fridge compartment retro fit kit for fire apparatus?
 
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